Secret Door

Internet Feels Like a Secret Door in the Wall #

Sometimes late at night the internet feels less like technology and more like a hidden room. Tonight everyone was asleep and the apartment was silent except for the modem noises, those horrible metallic alien sounds that basically announce: someone is entering cyberspace. Very elegant era for humanity. I spent almost two hours reading personal pages and online diaries from strangers in different cities and suddenly the world felt both enormous and weirdly intimate. That’s the strange thing about the internet right now. It still feels private even though technically it isn’t.

People write things online they would never say in classrooms.

Loneliness.
Music obsessions.
Photos scanned badly.
Poetry.
Entire emotional collapses in purple fonts.

Honestly beautiful.

Alexiel updated her website again and now I want to redesign my own page for the seventh time this month because apparently digital identity is becoming another form of psychological instability. Mom still doesn’t completely understand why I enjoy being online so much…

She says: “But you don’t even know these people.”

True.

And yet sometimes strangers online sound more honest than people at school. Maybe because screens remove embarrassment slightly. Or maybe because at night everybody becomes more truthful.

The internet feels like standing in a corridor full of lit windows and quietly looking inside.

Remember me,
Eclipse